Soo much to say..

First, off I am tired of people being disappointed in me for not updating my blog...soo well...I am going to start doing this once a week.! I will MAKE sure of it!

Recently, I have had a situtation come up in my life, where I feel very torn on whose side I should pick. It has vitually ruined my weekend and probulary my next couple of weeks. I am not going to disclose what is going on or who is involved but just the feelings of saddness, that has filled my weekend.

God created families so that we could learn to work together not to destroy families. In a Conference talk given by Thomas S. Monson, He talked about that all of us have trials and hard times but even when those come we must put a good face and keep a postive attitude.

I have a really hard time keeping a postive attitude towards hardtimes, I always have. I am very hard on myself, but today I have realized that even this extrremly unfair wrong thing is going on in my life. I can't just stop, and not move on. But I am having a very hard time moving on when others don't let you move on. Even when it's not your fault, even when you have thought out all the solutions, even when you thought it was over, someone always has to bring it up again. When something happens in our lives you can't keep bringing it up, because all the negative feelings you had will come back.

It's like sin, we all sin. None of us are perfect, but in order to go through the healing process everyone else has to move on as well, and it's impossible to do that if they won't let you forget about it.

Things happen, you can't fix all the evils in the world. If we could what would be the point being here?! Their wouldn't be a purpose! Some things can't be healed by a doctor office, or a surgery. We must allow things to be healed in the person times and not on OUR time table. It's selfish of us to try and solve the problems...sometimes their is no solution so we must find peace in that. This life isn't about fairness....It's like the song Hiliary Weeks sings, " Believe in who you are, believe your a daughter..." Faith that some how this is all going to work out in the end. Be a friend, not an enemy. Families stand together, not fall apart. I know families can be your strongest support but it can be also a destroying piece of each life. Choose what you want it do?!

Please...for anyone that reads this, in your own families and relationships realize that nothing is ever perfect. Their are always secrets that are hidden and protected and solutions that can't be found because it's impossible to find. But rememeber that you don't want to be the one that watches a city fall because of your unwillings to look past the whole city...you have only enetered one buliding.

But will of all of this saddest I have talked about...I can smile at so many things. How grateful I am for my family. I love each of them. I love for what they bring to the table.
My Dad, for his since of humor. He can always make you laugh.
My mother, she is truly an amazing women. She stands tall and proud. She carrys me through the darkest nights. My best friend. I love you mom! You have so much to give and live for.
Perry, a very hard worker. Will always support and help whoever reaches out for it.
Kristen, for the loving mother that I have seen you become. And for the happiest you bring to Perry. For the eternal family you are making with Shay and Grace.
Jonathan, you are just like dad. You can always make someone else laugh. And when someone needs a hand you will be their.
Kristnia, You are easy going and just go with the flow. You are very charitiable.
Dusin, You truly love everyone. You seek for the good in all.
Kendra, You are my twin, and I love you! We have really gone through a lot together. We have cryed many nights on each other shoulders. We may fight but we truly do love each other and do get along. We can get through anything.
Brady, Way to serve. Always wants to serve the Lord.
Kepler, I miss you! No matter how far away you are I think of you!

And someday I will have future in-laws. I KNOW I will love them as much as I love each of you!

I am so grateful for my Best Friend, Gavin...man he puts up with a lot from me, but ne never leaves. We always work together and figure things out. As, I always say to him, " We started out as enmies, became friends, became best friends, and somewhere through the mess of it all we fell in love!" He is my best friend.

We have so many things to be grateful for! So.."Be of Good Cheer"!